Monday, January 31, 2011

You know, I've been thinking

Why don't they just give Egypt back to us? Things were going pretty well for them back when we were their Gods, right?
The Human says, "You know, Spitty, that was all a really long time ago."
But I think it's worth a shot. I'm off to pack now.


Sunday, January 30, 2011

Spitty's Tent Baff

Well, Kitties, this afternoon's baff started out slow, just the tiniest tip of my pink tongue, delicately washing a front foreleg.

Then I picked up speed, a quick whisk over the nose, preparing for some major lickage of the frontal sections.

This may look a bit awkward, but a boy has to reach his back paws somehow!

Finally, all done & ready to emerge. Once the Human backs off a bit. Which might take awhile. ::Sigh::

Saturday, January 29, 2011


 What do you mean we're not on the guest list for the royal wedding?

Thursday, January 27, 2011

(Im)patiently Perched

I would like to settle in, curl up, relax, perhaps even get in a little nappy before dinner--and yet, Human, here you are, yet again, lurking about with the flashy box, setting my furs on edge.

So, Kitties, it's Thursday and not a moment too soon. I am told that the Human must attend a work event tomorrow night, but I look forward to Caturday, when the good fudz can be purchased, the toys can be played with, the pillows can be fluffed up to my liking, and, most importantly, the BRUSHIES can be carried out at leisure. I'm tired of these half-hearted three-minute sessions between coffee and CNN before she heads out the door.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Our Friend Fritzie

Oh hi, Kitties! Today we are giving you a break from my "black, satiny body" ( ;-)  Thanks, Admiral! I'll be expecting you later) in order to feature our friend Fritzie. 
Fritzie's People abandoned him a little while back to take a silly weekend trip to Yo-Sem-It-Tee. They left him to the tender mercies of my Human, who dutifully visited him twice a day and tried to be as friendly as he would allow. He was a little suspicious of her at first, but she finally won him over, just as his neglectful People returned. 
He's a beautiful big ole Orange Boy and the Human likes him a lot. Not as much as she likes me, of course--right? Right?

PeeEss: My Human is trying to learn how to use Picasa to store and upload pictures, but evidently she is not doing so well with it. She's none too bright. I think you can all see Fritzie now though!

Monday, January 24, 2011


I am sure you had an excellent reason for waking me, correct? 
Talk to the tail, then, 'cause Spitty ain't listening!

Sunday, January 23, 2011

How long do you think

it would take me to polish off the whole tree, leaf by leaf?

Friday, January 21, 2011

The Tail, Boss, The Tail!

Good Evening, Kitties! Here I am, uncharacteristically posing on the top of my tower. The mid-level affords a better street view, but the tippy-top allows me to meet the Human eye-to-eye, not that I have any wish to make a regular habit of that.::shudder::

It is unseasonably warm and sunny here, and, honestly, who can really complain about that? My Human, that's who. She loves storms and rain and hail and cold weather; go figure. But the sunshine reflected so nicely on my tail-furs that even she admitted it was a lovely sight to behold.

Hope all you Kitties are planning a fiendish weekend!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Thursday Is Furzday

Well, honestly, every day is furs day, so really there's nothing special about tonight's baff. Except....

Yes, Kitties, take a nice, looooong gander at Spittola's beauteous and lengthy pink tongue! And that is why tonight's baff is special after all!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011


O Sweet Relief! Just look, Kitties: One beef, two chickens, three turkeys. Thank Cod! Now, in fact, I only get the Good Stuff like, maaaaaybe, once a month, if I play my cards right, twice at the most, but it was positively nerve-wracking to know there was NONE in the house. Now I can sleep again.

Oh! And we have not visited the 'Nip plant lately. The truth is, the Human came very, very, very close to killing it about six weeks ago (best to draw a dark curtain across that horrifying incident), but now it looks pretty good. Of course, after all the trouble she went to to grow it and then to rescue it, I show only moderate interest. Ha ha ha ha ha!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Spitty Under Glass

Hello, Kitties!  Although the Human is 90% recovered, I still find it wise to keep some barrier between us-- you know, just in case (not that she's ever been violent or anything). She spent an actual day at work today and honestly, it was a relief to have her out of the house.

On the up side, she is certainly well enough to go to the store now and replenish the Gerber meat supply. On the down side, she says that after her long, tiring day she can hardly be expected to race out to the market.

Yes, I've been given my regular wet and dry fudz today, and yes I have eaten them, but it's the principle of the thing. I can't rest easy when the larder is so bare of potential treats.

Am I right or am I right?

Monday, January 17, 2011

Approach with Caution

The Human seems better. Still, it's wise to be stealthy; fortunately, that's my best thing! Also, never look directly at the target. Just stand quietly while you absorb the aura, you know?

I was a little off my fudz last night and this morning (it got kind of hot here all of a sudden), so a while ago I scored almost a whole jar of Gerber Beef! Yummmmmm. Very tasty. I hope she will go to the market later as that was the Very.Last.Jar of the baby meats and we just cannot tolerate that kind of shortage no matter what is wrong with her Toof.

Important note:  Yes, Kitties, you CAN has the baby meats and they are delicious! Better than any cat treat ever invented! The beef, the chicken, the hams, the turkey and more!!! Why should those Human babies get all the good stuff? My Human says it is probably not good for us kittehs as a steady diet, but as a special once-in-awhile treat? It's the BEST! Why delay--send your Human to the store tonight!

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Can you find my nose?

Hello, Kitties!  Here I am all tucked up inside my tent (though you can't exactly see the tent!).  I am still steering clear of the Grump.

The Human has had many a root canal, but never one like this. She is seriously bummed, in considerable misery, and ready to call that endodontist and give him a piece of what's left of her mind. She has missed some fun activities this three-day weekend, which is making her even crabbier than usual. Thank Cod my fudz have arrived on schedule!

I really hope she will help me visit later, but frankly I am not holding my breath.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

The Tale of the Toof

Oh my Cod! I have never heard so much moaning and groaning and whimpering in my life, Kitties! The Human had her "Root Canal" Thursday and there hasn't been a moment's peace since.

Honestly, I'd expect less complaining from Doug and Wendy Whiner (and the Human says if you know them, you're old as dirt, like she is).

Yeah, okay, Human,  it hurts, I get it. But she's got her ibuprofen, she's got her Vicodin, she's got her bourbon. Take any or all of these, and Shut Up, please! A boy needs some peace and quiet to nap on this almost-springlike afternoon!

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Wednesday Wondering

Hello, Kitties! As I took a leisurely morning baff today (Why hello, Flashy Box!), I pondered the fate of a surprising new tender shoot on the Spitty Tree, planted and maintained for my personal pleasure and consumption.

When the Spitty Tree first came to live here several years ago, it was bushy and lush, more a shrub than a Tree. Over time, I ate steadily through the many lower branches, until the shrub-that-was reached Tree status. But over the last few days, I have noticed this:

What to do, what to do? Gobble that tender shoot up rightnowthisveryminute, or exercise some self-discipline and delayed gratification, and allow it to grow into a larger, possibly more satisfying, treat?

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Mmmm-Mmmm Good!

Kitties, do you see my delicate pink tongue just peeking out there on the left? Yes? Well, that's because I have just finished my delicious dinner of Whiska's Filet Mignon flavor and I am licking my manly chops.

I used to like this flavor quite a lot, so the Human went out and purchased mass quantities for me. But then (heh, heh) I refused to eat it anymore, so she finally gave it all away. Recently, she bought a couple of cans just to see if I might have changed my mind, and (surprise!) yes, I have.

Now, Kitties, the game is: Can I subtly encourage her to buy another case or two for me, and then (wait for it now!) stop eating it again?

Monday, January 10, 2011

If only . . .

. . . my comfy cuppy bed plugged in and warmed up like Darling Millie's! Still, it's very cozy and fits me just purrfectly. See?

The Human went back to work today, where everyone is still feeling all fretful and frustrated and furious. I say they should all take a lesson from us kittehs and chillax in the eye of the storm.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Here Comes the Sun

Hello, Kitties!  The mood around here has lifted a bit (thank Cod) and today was brighter all around. The Human stopped sulking around and finally put away the Krissymouse things, took out all the trash and recycling, changed my litterbox, and did the laundry. It always improves my mood when the staff takes care of these chores.

I love my scratching post. I don't often use my paws in anger but I like to keep my nails in fighting trim, just in case, you know.

Hope all you Kitties and Humans had a good weekend. We're hoping for a happier week!

Saturday, January 8, 2011

On Alert

Well, Kitties, the Human is grumpy and when the Human's grumpy, I feel it is my responsibility to be on the lookout for my own best interests (I'll bet you thought I was going to say it was my responsibility to "Cheer her up," or "Comfort her," didn't you? Ha ha ha--c'mon, I thought you knew Spitty better than that!)

No, I am doing my best to curl up, in alert mode of course, and take lots of blissful naps, and hope Monday comes soon so she will have to go back to Work, where the Bad Things are happening.

More Bad Things happened at the dentist yesterday, when she was referred to a specialist who will do a "complicated" root canal (is that like the Panama Canal?) to save her toof  (ka ching! ka-ching! ka-ching!).

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Toof Ache & Work Woes

The Human is having a bad week, Kitties, and even I feel a little sorry for her. One problem will get fixed when she sees the dentist tomorrow, but the other one will just go on and on! Poor Human! Let me get you a treat!

We'll be back on the weekend.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Tuesday Tent Time

Now, Kitties, I was truly and deeply and comfortably asleep here in my favorite cozy tent, when I was (Click-Flash! Click-Flash! Click-Flash!) ripped untimely from my sweet dreams. I hardly had time to get one eye opened, let alone two. And, as you can see, I may have had a fur or six out of place.

Hmmm, I wonder if I could learn to use the flashy box? Two can play at this game, Human.

Monday, January 3, 2011

"You'd better not pout"

The Human went back to her j-o-b today, without even asking me if I was done having her home with me all the time. And you know, I wasn't.

I think I miss her presence throughout my day, poking and prodding at me inside my little tent, picking me up (!) without permission, waking me from a sound slumber to ask if I'd like some brushies (Well, duh, of course I would!) and otherwise including me in her daily life, even if that sometimes meant I had to contend with ::shudder:: "guests."

But she insists the j-o-b is necessary for our comfy little life, and that I probably would not be happy if we had to go live in her car. I guess I can't argue with that.

Also, please note that in today's photo I have one red and one green eye. The Human was going to use the "Fix red eye" feature in her photo editor, but then she decided, Hey--it's still the holiday season!

I think I look sort of festive. Oh, and the pouting? I'm guessing Santa will forget this little episode by next Christmas.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Spitty's Red Period

Now, the Giver of the Red Christmas Blossoms believes they could be year-round Red Anytime Blossoms, but I dunno. Electric Red Blossoms in January seem a little wrong to me. Still, it's worth considering so I conducted a closer inspection this morning:

And then, of course, I took a nap to think about it. I think a little red rubbed off on me, don't you?

Saturday, January 1, 2011

The Morning After

Good Morning and Happy New Year, Kitties!

I not only survived the Human ball-watching party, I was a very brave and social boy! I only spent about five minutes UTB before I wandered out amongst the guests (invaders). As long as they abided by the three commandments (Don't look at me, Don't talk to me, and for Bast's sake, Don't touch me), we all got along just fine. I explored the Forest of Lower Limbs, sniffed courteously at the occasional proffered hand, and sometimes settled in comfortably (just out of reach, of course) for extended periods of observing the Humans at play.

All in all, it was quite a successful evening, despite an alcohol-fueled "discussion" amongst a few of the invaders, ha ha ha! That was pretty entertaining! All hiss and no bitey, though if they'd had fur, a little might have flown!

Hope Everykitty and Human has a warm & cozy day!