. . . Fat?Well, Kitties, do I have a story for you today! Sit back, pour yourself a nice cold Niptini, and listen to King-Uncle Spittola spin a tale for you. It's about Everykitty's favorite topic: Teh Fudz.
Way back in the dim mists of time (2004), I was brought here to the Palace as a wee Prince. Ever since, the Human has struggled mightily to get me to eat. Many's the time she's opened two, three, four cans, hoping I might deign to take a nibble from at least one of her pathetic offerings. She would practically weep in frustration when I frequently spurned all the choices, drank a little water, nommed a couple pieces of kibble and that, my Furiends, was that. There were occasional days when even the Gerber's could not tempt me into eating.
On an average day, maybe half of the half-can I was served for breakfast still remained at 5:00 p.m. For Lo! those many years, I was a very skinny ManCat.
About seven weeks have passed since then, and Kitties, something, something very strange, has gradually come over me. After eight long years of near-complete indifference to food, eight long years as the Prince of Pickiness, the Sultan of Starvation, I, Spitty-the-Kitty, have learned the Joy of Eating. I eat, and I eat, and I eat. I have joined the ranks of the Feline Clean Plate Club.
I have moved from Take it away, Human to Bring it on and the more the better. I sing out proudly:
♫ ♫ Food, glorious food,
We're anxious to try it,
Three banquets a day,
Our favourite diet!
Just picture a great big steak,
Fried, roasted or stewed,
Oh! Food, wonderful food, marvelous food, glorious food! ♫ ♫
* * * * * * *Many moons ago, Sassy and Callie made me this very cool icon. At the time, I could not find the proper use for it. TODAY, however, I display it with pride: