Kitties! Last night after the Block Pawty, the Aunties came over for an adult beverage, and they came bearing a gift! A gift for me! They purchased this royal throne for my sweet girl Onyx, but do you know what? Onyx spurned it, yes she did! They tried for a whole month to lure her onto it, using all their Human wiles, but Onyx wanted no part of it, unh-unh, no way, not having nuffing to do wif it. Girlcats! ::rolls eyes:: So, who is their next-favorite kitty? Why, it's me of course. And does King Spitty refuse a gift from his loyal and devoted Human subjects? Why no indeed, he does not. It is ultra-fun and super comfy. What a treasure! Thanks, Aunties!
You may think this picture is from yesterday, but I assure you, my Loyal Subjects, that it is most certainly *not* -- today was even worser than yesterday. Oh, the Hots! Oh, the Humids! Oh Bast! Can it please be winter soon? I'll be a Good Boy, I promise!
I am not really supposed to climb up on this table where there are things that I might knock over and break. As if this is the freaking Louvre and her tacky tchotchkes are valuable objets d'art and not candles from the Dollar Store on a cheap tray from Pier One. Spitty does what he pleases, when he pleases and nobody tells him, "No."
Back in mid-July, in an outrage worthy of being the lead story in Cat Fancy magazine (though I am not the least bit fancy), I was deprived of numerous little mouth-weapons (i.e., teefs). Now, as if that wasn't bad enough, while I was anesthetized, my claws--my beautiful, long, shimmering swords of doom--were efficiently and summarily clipped right down to their nubs, Kitties, to their little nubs! It was NotRight. But unlike teefs, the claws--well, the claws can be coaxed back from oblivion by regular and intensive workouts on the sisal scratcher. I confess I was a tiny bit distracted by an interesting noise in the street, but I assure you I got right back to my regular workout. If I scratch it, they will grow.
Kitties! Last night, the Human had the very tiniest of dinner parties for a dear Human friend who retired last month. Would you believe Yours Truly joined into the festivities just like he was a normal, friendly Boy? I even allowed Aggie & Wally & Madie's Human Dad to pet me. Yes, Kitties, he touched me! Can you believe that, Scouty!?
of the damage that's been inflicted over the years on the front and top of this chest that belonged to the Human's Grammie. But let's just say BooBoo and Angela and Mr. Teeth and Clarkie had a paw or 16 in it, too.
Oh Kitties! My brand new Royal Beddie fits purrfectly inside the tippy-top of my favorite perch next to the Human's desk, where I can reach out a paw if necessary to remind her (gently, of course) of my petting needs. And other needs, like food, and brushies, and playtimes. This fine Beddie was HAND-CROCHETED by Punapippuri--oh wait, really, Human? Okay, well by a member of Punapippuri's staff who does his bidding.
Oh my Cod, Kitties, you would not believe what arrived in the mail today from my fellow royal, Punapippuri, King Kitty-Cat of Finland (N). There was so much bounty it will take days and days and furever to share it all. For today, we offer a little :32 movie of my Valerian-saturated Polliwogbliss. If you turn up your sound, you will hear some exciting purry noises at the end. It is an Oscar-worthy performance:
See that cool gray stuff over there? < < < Yes, Kitties, the City does not disappoint. And that random lady across the street? Well, she's wearing a jacketanda scarf. Imagine that! It's gonna be a blankie kind of night, oh yes it is.
The Human imagines she will spend a bunch of time tomorrow making lesson plans for those poor unsuspecting yoofs the eager students in her new classes next week. *I* have other ideas about fun ways to spend Caturday. Really, Kitties, who you gonna bet on?
A number of years ago, the Human had a difficult colleague with whom she had little in common. However, this colleague took a liking to me, and once she made a "collage"-type picture for me with my glorious legend on the reverse. Until very recently it hung in the Human's office, but it is now awaiting a place on the walls of our little home. The Human has completely lost contact with the colleague, but *I* think of her fondly from time to time.
Well, Kitties, today was The Day: The Human took herself off to the Education Factory and stayed there for like, elebenty-squillion hours. And when she came home she was in a Bad Mood, and she said the nice vacation of foods and pettings and brushies and on-demand playtimes was over. I find that completely unacceptable. I'm thinking about moving away to someplace where I am not treated with such cavalier indifference. Anyone with enough extra space for a middle-aged floofy boycat who's not very nice?
So as even non-California residents know, we are in the midst of a terrible, years-long drought. While most of the attention falls on agriculture, today I want to spotlight the Aunties' back yard which I observe carefully for several hours each morning and evening. As you can see, the lawn, alas, she is no more. Soon, however, the lovely smooth dirt you see spread out so delightfully below will be covered up by . . . yes, you guessed it: Beautiful artificial turf, just like them hated Cowboys play on in Dallas. Stay tuned, Kitties!
Hello, Kitties! Sometimes, I abandon a purrfectly good beddie for no apparent reason. I avoid it for months. The Human begins to think, "Why am I keeping this useless floofy bed on a dining room chair when That Cat has not come near it in months? I should toss it out on its pillowy little a$$ and reclaim my chair, is what I should do." What she doesn't realize is that I can hear her thoughts. And no sooner has the above idea taken shape in her mind, when ::abracadabra:: it is my favorite warm and squashy beddie again. It's wonderful how this works out, isn't it?
The Human and a friend had a nice lunch with adult beverages at a tiny cafe in Sausalito on this lovely day and then drove through Fort Baker. The days of summer vacation are ticking down to a precious few . . . Oh please! What the heck has *she* got to complain about? I didn't even get to go! I have not even appeared in my own blog for the last two days!
Pretty soon the original Bay Bridge will be gone-gone-gone. And yes, strictly speaking, the Human *did* take this while she was driving. This is Teddy. He is ultra-handsome. The Human tried to have a fling with him this afternoon, but he spurned her for the cheating floozie that she is.