Here, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty!

She'll have to work harder than that to get my full attention. For example, I'd like to hear the satisfying Pop! of a Gerber's jar being opened. That would be nice, very nice.

I'm Listening

Yes, uh-huh, I think I hear what you're saying. Let me see if I have this right: Today is Friday. You are leaving for work at about 6:30 a.m., and you expect to be home after a school event that should end around ten tonight. Uh-huh. I see. Okay.

Then tomorrow morning--Caturday morning, you'll be going back to work around nine a.m. and then afterwards you have a few other things to do, so you don't really have an ETA for your return. Uh-huh. Yes, I see. Of course.

And, still, you think it is a fine idea to lie down and go to sleep with no barrier of any sort between your face and the twenty (oh, all right, if you want to get all technical about it: eighteen) pointy bits at the end of my mighty, black-furred limbs. Well, you always were an optimist. Why change now?

Identity Crisis

I know I'm 'dopted, 

but could she

really be my Mama?

Shoe-Shopping

Perhaps some of you recall this post? 

Well, that was Then, and this is Now, but I can't really say that Now is any better than Then,                        so I am shoe- shopping.

Oh, not to wear, you understand (after all, King Spitty is not Carrie Bradshaw). 

No, King Spitty is looking for a shoe with the perfect dimensions for his next good Yak.

Huh. Maybe these newish gray flats?

A Perfectly Good CatLoaf

ruined. 

Yes, heh heh, I was curled in perfect CatLoaf po-zish, but then I saw the Flashy Box, so I curled my floofy tail outward just enough to spoil the streamlined look so essential to a tasty CatLoaf.

I consider it my Royal Duty to mete out annoyances like this to keep the subjects humble.

ManCat Monday: Sweet Relief

Ah, my Kitties, do you see? Do you see how comfertabuls and at peace your King is today?

Well, there's a reason for that, and I am sure you can all figure out just what it is.

That's right, Kitties, the Loathesome Introoder Beloved Younger Cousin got on an airplane this afternoon and flew away into the sunset--until next time anyway.

My Ess Does Not Belong in the Bedroom

And yet, and yet. . .here it is. Guess why?

I bet you got it in one:

It would be in the Introoder's* Way in the dining room.

Oooooooh, noooooooooo!

We can't have that, now can we?

*The Human's obnoxious beloved younger cousin.

Caturday: Inbayded!

Can you spot the tell-tale signs of The Ebil One?

Now, you may think, "Spitty! What are you doin' playing like that with the Ebil One?" but, Kitties, when it comes to the fev-ver wand, I just cannot help myself. 

I am ashamed, but there you go.

Formerly Feral Friday

At first, I was all:

but then I:

(Return of the) Not-a-Garden-Tour #12

The Human had a random day off a couple of weeks ago, so she took her car into a garage about a mile away to be worked on. On her walk home, she captured these exciting photos of weekday life in her neighborhood.

This is not what I'd call a reassuring name for a business.

Is this truck spewing something out or sucking something up? Either way, it can't be good.

If you're going to write instructions on the street, could you use a more restful color?

See how effective these 'No Parking' signs are?

We are getting new tracks . . .

. . . for these.

If the Human had a reading lamp like this one, she wouldn't need new glasses.

Who knows what this guy was doing with his rope, but the speed bump sign was a new one to the Human! 

And here we are back on our little street. 

And that's it for our Not-a-Garden-Tour! Maybe next time we can find a flower or two.

Wordless Wednesday on the Windowsill

At the Movies: Spitty Is Sleepy

Sunpuddle between the storms.

La mouche

Elle est morte. Muah ha ha ha ha.

In the Royal Bedchamber

All was well: The breakfast noms had been acceptable, the bed was sufficiently soft, the ambiance was warm and quiet. The Royal Nap had commenced.

And then . . . 

You-Know-Who could not leave well enough alone. 

N.B.: Oh, I want her home all right; I just don't want her bothering me unless I summon her.

N.B. #2: I frowed up in one of her good shoes last night. 

Caturday a.m., UTT

O hi there, Kitties! Well, it's the weekend, and as usual, the Human has 'bandoned me for work again. Honestly, who can I speak to about this? I mean, she was gone for 14 hours yesterday, and then she got up and headed out this morning to interview potential applicants at a teacher job fair. 

I mean, how important can that be? I thought kids these days taught themselves everything they needed to know from their laptops and phones and calculators and tablets and notebooks and iPads and iPods and Wikipedia. What do they need teachers for?

Oh, and P.S. Evidently some of you your silly Humans thought that the King was baring his Royal Claws in yesterday's picture. Not so! Those are charming little tufts of extra fur.

Up Close and Fursonal: Air Biscuit

Spitty don't play Air Biscuit, but the exception proves the rule.

I wasn't really that happy though.

My Crack Problem

Oh, Kitties! Do you a-member this post?

Well! That was then, and this is now!

Do you see? Do you see how I am ignoring my Stinky Goodness?

Do you know what is in this bowl?

Crack!

The Human says it's Royal Canin Kitten 36.

King Spitty knows he has left his Royal Kittenhood far behind, but this stuff?

Well, this is GOLD.

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday: Paw2Paw

Wait, Human. Stay just a moment longer.

Truck on Tuesday

The Human believes I should be more curious about this truck that appeared suddenly on our street. 

Can't she see I am already worried sick about it?

ManCat Monday: Wassup, Pussycats?

Can you tell me where that hour is that Humans lost on Caturday?

How can they be "saving" daylight if they keep losing hours?

New Perch

You know, Kitties, King Spitty is a creature of habit. So when the other day the Human saw me perched atop a bookcase I have never been known to frequent, she whipped out the Flashy Box in the blink of an eye.

Of course, being King, I may Occupy any surface I please, and, rather suddenly, it pleases me to Occupy these bookshelves. 

They aren't very tidy, are they?

And Now for Something Completely Different

Friday was a beautiful sunny day in the concrete jungle.

And what lovely sight greeted the Human as she stepped out of our front door?

Why yes, it was our charming neighbor from across the hall, catching a few rays in the only space immediately available.

We think he really adds a little something of interest to the block, don't you?

Okay, okay: By popular demand from the CB Moms....

Now, What's This Nonsense?

Please, somebody, make it stop!

Royal Ear Innards, Chapter 2

Well, there's just no end to this, is there?

So, in addition to considerable interior equipment, I apparently have photogenic ear furs.

Frankly, I think my readers have seen just about enough of the Royal Ears for one week, don't you?

Almost-Wordless Wednesday: Desperate

All right. I admit it. I miss her! 

Please come home, Human. 

I'll be good.

Sort of.

Could someone please hold my little paw for a while?

Tuesday Tunnel Travel

I know where I'm starting from . . .

. . . but where have I ended up?

ManCat Monday: My Comfy Chair

Oh, the bliss of a soft beige blanket in the sun!

Breakfast was delicious, too.

Who needs the Human anyway? Certainly not me.

Sunday Sun Baff

After a vigorous session pursuing my new hobby, there's nothing like a leisurely baff in the sunshine to finish off my exercise before consuming a tasty brunch. The Human's off taking care of business all day today, so I am preparing for a relaxing afternoon and evening of mayhem and napping. Please feel free to join in! Look for the ninth stop on the Tunnel Express.

T-minus 24 Hours and Counting

So tomorrow begins the Big Akkredita Ackreddi Accreditaysh Visit to The Human's school by the Important Fancy People who come to see if they're doin' it right.

We will try to keep posting but our visiting might be severely curtailed till after they are gone (next Furzday). The Human says she will be mighty glad to see the back side of them by then! 

Having served on these teams herself, she knows it's no picnic for them either, but right now she's feeling too sorry for herself to care much about their troubles one way or the other, ha ha meow! 

I just don't think it's right that all this Human travail has such a negative impact on my life!

Anatomically Correct

Honestly, is there NO privacy left at all? Here I was, sleeping peaceably in my Hammick, when--well, you all know:                     

Clickety! Clickety! Clickety! 

Of course, she aimed the camera straight down, and thus you see the above result: Up close and personal with Spitty's Royal Ear-Innards.

Sigh.