Saturday, September 8, 2012

Prince of Kiimamaa

Oh Kitties! Looky, looky, looky
Spitty-the-Kitty has his own Coat of Arms!
My Esteemed Furiend, His Majesty Punapippuri designed it for me his very own self!
And look! There are my own Great Balls of Fire, still with me after all!
And a new Crown!
Furiends, I am nearly speechless with gratitude for His Majesty's generosity.

My Finnish Fiefdom, however, has turned out to be a swamp. You may be thinking, "This does not look like much of a fiefdom, Spitty." Well, you would be wrong! Wrong, wrong, wrong, my Furry Friends! I visited today and I can report it's a woodsy wonderland!

There are moose, mice, voles, lemmings (mmmmmm, tasty lemmings!) and a great variety of birds.  Although there is no castle (a bit of a bummer, I do confess), I am sure my fellow Royal will not mind helping me construct a modest manor. Punapippuri suggests a sauna as well, but I dunno: Saunas and fursuits don't seem to mix. Maybe you gotta be a Finn to understand the appeal of that?

I am told Kiimamaa translates as the Land of Rutting. I approve of this, even as I acknowledge that recent events make the activity a tad less likely.

I thank my esteemed Royal Furiend for his gracious gift, as well as for his forgiveness of my inadvertent intrusion so uncomfortably close to the Finnish border. 

Kitties, you can all rest easy now: Peace Is at Paw.

36 comments:

Seville at Nerissa's Life said...

How wonderful! I think a coat of arms designed especially for you is a wonderful thing. Next, you'll be getting your own tartan.

Now, regardeing this sauna issue... I don't think you should get one. Personally, I have never experienced an actual sauna however, I overheard the peeps talking one day when it was super hot and the humidex was just a-soaring and peep #1 said, "It's like a sauna out there." And let me tell you... 'out there' was not nice. Way too hot and humid. And the peep should know 'bout such things as her grandparents had a sauna in their basement. They were Finns, you know. They liked it but... I'm thinking... they're not great for us cats.

purrs

Cotton said...

Coat of arms? How cool!
Glad to know that we are in peace :)
Cotton

Unknown said...

Spitty! This is too cool! Yous has gone form being the King to being the Prince of Kiimamaa in a wasteland covered with snows at least 9 months of the year! Yous will needs the sauna so the brass things Katie bought your Cat Ruler of the World vote with, don't fall off the Brass Monkey - next month!
Me loves yous anyway!
Kisses
Nellie
BTW - me has some very nice beach front property on Great Bear Lake...

Summer at sparklecat.com said...

Let me see... you got a swamp and Puna and his kingdom got a bridge. Isn't this the sort of deal con artists make on street corners? Just sayin'.

Angel Prancer Pie said...

Concats, Spitty! The Land of Rutting is purrfect fur you. What delishus ladycat do you see sittin on the kitteh tower throne next to thee?

Andrea and the Celestial Kitties said...

Way cool coat of arms! Coat of Paws! Coat of Claws? MOL, it's awesome!
And so is your swampy fiefdom! Yes, it does need a manor house, with lots of pink beds and comfy cat trees and servents!

Star says: Spitty! Congratulations! What a wonderful thing for Punapippuri to give you! Can I visit it with you? Soon... You'll understand my request when you see what humiliation has befallen me recently.. *sigh* I need a cuddle and a scritch..

Andrea and the Celestial Kitties said...

Star says: Wow.. I guess you said it all, Spit-man... I mean, I stuck by your side when all the females were ready to hiss your face off. I stood by your side when you were... you know.. But I have one little bout with f-l-e-a-s and you won't stand by me? I'll be sure to send you a notorized copy of my flea-free certificate........ eventually..

Andrea and the Celestial Kitties said...

Star Says: Wow Spitty! I am surprised that you changed your mind! Not that I don't agree with your mom and all, but a begrudging boyfriend isnt exactly what I was hoping for. However, while you're looking for your hazmat suit, my mom checked me over very carefully and said she sees nothing alive in my furs. If that helps.. Purr XOXO

Catio Tales said...

My most esteemed royal friend, and Prince of Kiimamaa. We are proud to have you on board. It is most amusing reading these comments. And Sparkle, I am no concat! This is a most excellent deal. First let me tell you there are no fleas in Finland - they all get killed in winter. And saunas are a great idea when it is cold outside - and it is fine for long furs provided you don't sit on the stones. We have nice wooden benches where we sit and shouldn't scratch - but we do. Admittedly, our naked ninjas are in there more than us long furs right now.
And we know Kiimamaa is a swamp but it has most excellent potential - there are no alligators either. I think this is the most perfect deal, and when you feel like you need some peace and quiet, and to escape from everything, there is no better place. Tervetuloa, my royal friend.

Andrea and the Celestial Kitties said...

Star says: my mom checked her email, and she cant stop laughing! She woke daddy up and he thought she was dying! But I think you're very sweet and I love the gifty! XOXOXOXOXO

Angel Simba said...

The coat of Paws is very nice and we are glad about the Peace. We're sure you can arrange for the necessary 'improvements" there to make it worthy of your kinglyness (er princelyness?). Lemmings sound interesting but don't follow them off any cliffs.

Mollie said...

Oh wow Spitty..your own coat of arms.. Fings can only get better :) xx00xx

Katie Isabella said...

I am still partly overwhelmed by all these riches you have had bestowed upon you and the opulence of the hunting grounds. My faintiness will subside after this next nap I daresay. Perhaps a lap or two of haff'n'haff to revive me? XXOO

Brian's Home Blog said...

That is very impressive Spitty and I am glad that peace has purrvailed!

Shaggy and Scout said...

All the Norwegians around these parts (Minnesota) like to run nekkid in the snow and jump into their saunas, at least that's what we hear. We figure the Swedes and Finns are right there with them. But you are a Californian and it's ok if that's not our cup 'o tea.

Katnip Lounge said...

Spitty, our Mommy says she remembers spending many fun nights cavorting about in the woods! Although she doesn't recall if lemmings or any other small rodents were involved.
We cannot wait to see what manner of manor you will...erm...erect.

Texas, a Cat in... Austin said...

Wow... can we visit?
Purrs

A Tonk's Tail said...

Great Balls of Fire, Spitty! We's laffing over Sparkle's comment! Be wary of anyone offering you oceanfront property too....

Terri said...

Excellent compromise, your majesty! Sounds like some nice hunting in your future :)

The Furries of Whisppy said...

That looks like a superb playground! When's the party, Spitty?

CATachresis said...

ConCats King Spitty! We are in awe! So you are the King of Rutting! This is so similar to me, as I have been declared the King of Strutting, which I am reliably informed is very close by! We are neighbours :) Errr could I have my ball back, please? >^,,^<

The Island Cats said...

Well, that's a pretty cool Coat of Arms, Spitty. We like the great balls of fire...very appropriate. BTW, what does a lemming taste like? We've never had one.

Kat said...

Coat of Arms! Talk about cool ;) Con-cat-ulations, Spitty!

Pretinha said...

Spitty congratulations coat, he's gorgeous, a big black cat guarras sharp, ready to defend his kingdom. Glad you came to an agreement. Long live peace!

Sweet Purrfections said...

That's just too cool!

Anonymous said...

Very Majestical. Now go forth, my Liege, and smite those lemmings. SMITE them!

Mariodacat said...

Hey dude - do you still associate with a moggie like me from the street of my home town? I could get M to start calling me Sir. Mario I supposed. he he I'm glad there is peace in your kingdom again.

Callie (a.k.a. Trouble) said...

So do we still call you King Spitty or Prince Spitty?

Sassy

Just Ducky said...

Your Highness, we loves your badge, you will have your, ahem, balls of fire, forever.

Mark's Mews (Marley, Lori, Loki, and Binq) said...

The Coat of Arms is great! A castle is a problem though. As all Monty Python fans know, it takes several tries to get a castle to stay up in a swamp, and that takes a lot of green papers (and peasants).

So we suggest merely raising a portion on the swamp to where you can grow a patch of nice deep grass. A grass patch would be better than a sauna.

Regarding yer comment about size, yeah, I was a tiny cat at about 5-6 pounds before I was finally successfully tutored. I am between 8-9 pounds now.

But remember: "Its not the size of the cat in the fight, but the size of the fight in the cat"! ~ AYLA

GreatGranny said...

Concats, sweet Spitty. You'll always be King with me, but a fine Prince you are.
xoxo Kassey

Oui Oui said...

Wow! How exciting and creative! We are glad you explained those flaming balls because the mom thought they were "hot shit", literally. We'd love to have coat of arms too.

Cathy Keisha said...

Concats!! U da cat! Have u seen MY coat of arms? http://twitpic.com/3y24d0 Glad to have royalty on our campaign staff.

Angel Simba said...

Thanks for your comment. Our Mom human would not be able to chance face-to-belly snorgling us - we look so innocent lying like that but would grab and bit her head and face. She can't even pet my tummy with her hand, though she can do that with Audrey.

meowmeowmans said...

Spitty, could you possibly get any cooler??? That is pawsome, pal!

Stacy Hurt said...

2012/9/9

My dearest Sir Spitfire,
(or whatever empty title you are being given these days)

I have decided to answer your complaint purrrsonally. While it may seem to you that the footage released on my blog was done with malice and aforethought, I can assure you that is not the case!

Not only has the publication of the footage enhanced the sympathy for your situation throughout the CatBlogosphere, it has garnered you new readership! Further it has given those new readers ability to witness your incredible bravery in the face of certain doom. I have read many accounts from those readers who seem to toss accolade upon accolade at your wee cerulean paws.

Between you and me, if you were to enter the 'Cat Ruler of the World' race you would most certainly win paws down! Any of those other Catidates would give their front fangs for publicity like that! I bestowed it upon you gratis; free of charge; NOT because I expected you to be thankful, or even toss some cans of tuna my way... NO, I did it because I admire you so; a fact which you seem to have chosen to blatantly ignore. did I not bestow upon you a recovery gift fit for a King? didn't I have it made specially with a pink side that I personally find abhorrent? I ask you, would a Cat bent on slandering your character do such things? Of course not.

I am rather stunned by your adverse and if I may say, rather ungrateful and unseemly reaction. Sending your lackey to my private residence is really going too far. Poor Mr. Grey may be scarred for life after his encounter with Little Miss Hissy Boots. Am I demanding restitution for his wounds? NO! Of course not. It would be beneath me to engage in such a crass action, I'm sure you would agree.

I count myself befuddled by your insistence on what can only be described as a blackmail attempt as a resolution to this trivial misunderstanding. Surely a Cat of your stature and grace shouldn't stoop so low as to demand any amount of turkeys or any other type of foul fowl.

However, in order to put this silliness to rest I am willing to negotiate. I will continue to send you my Christmouse gift of an entire smoked salmon and in addition will supply you with Mr. Grey's services (at my full expense) anytime you require him to accompany you should you need added security whilst traveling and trifling in your tunnel.
(and with as much *traveling* as you've done you will most certainly need his services sooner rather than later.)

So there you have it my good Cat. I truly hope that you will accept this gesture in the spirit of which it is given, one of furriendship and mutual admiration.

As always,
xoxo
Ms. Stella O'Houligan